hey in my opinion misha replied to all the ones he read and if you were texting him about your depression and suicidal thoughts, if he read that he would have definitely replied and helped you because thats just the sort of person he is.
And im so happy youre doing much better now and please dont be embarrassed of what you said. to you back then, those words were you being completely honest with someone for once and i guess it helped you through it because you felt like you had someone you could be completely honest with; an outlet.
and believe me misha will never think youre pathetic. I can assure you he will never think of you as pathetic. I’ve seen first hand Misha comforting a girl at a con who was suffering suicidal thoughts and although he had limited time to talk to her, the expression on his face definitely didnt convey that he thought she was pathetic.